What happens when U.S. Senator Ben “Never Trump” Sasse, who it turns out from his voting record is actually U.S. Senator Ben “Always Trump” Sasse, turns the Lincoln, Nebraska marathon into a pathetic campaign opportunity for his inevitable 2020 presidential run? Betsy shows up.
Sen Ben Sasse, in gray shirt, politicizing the marathon. With Betsy Riot.
Posted by Craig Roper on Sunday, May 7, 2017
betsy
noun
/fək’ thē in’ är ā/
plural: betsies, betsys, a riot of betsies
1. an unapologetic feminist patriot who has fucking had enough of Trump culture and gun culture and the death and terror they inflict on America
2. a nonviolent act of civil disobedience against fascism, Trump, or gun culture
verb
past tense: betsied
to prank, lambaste, and generally fuck up whitewing gunlicking bullshit
“That riot of betsies betsied the shit out of the gun show.”
TFW you and your hatriot buds are all ready to whip out the vienna sausages for your weeniesqueeze when what’s that overhead? It’s Betsy Buzzkill.
A new fan of Betsy sent us this picture from #NRAAM2017 in Atlanta.
The Betsy FuckYourGunsMobile joined other protestors at the Die-In at Woodruff Park in Atlanta at the #NRAAM2017
Do you hear that? Why, it sounds like a tsunami of sweet, sweet gunlicker tears heading our direction as we pack up our aero-plane and head to Atlanta for the NRA Annual Anal Leakage Meeting.
#NRAAM2017 #NRAAM #NRAAMATLANTA #NRA #FUCKTHENRA
You know how the United States is overrun by assholes who simultaneously espouse the most disgusting anti-poor, pro-death, pro-gun fuckery AND thump Bibles and listen to shitty Christian rock? Betsy is fed up with churches that reassure greaseturds that their Savior rejoices in public policy that degrades women and promotes poverty, misery, and white nationalism. So she has been seeking out these hives, going straight to the churches to ask parishioners how in the holy fuck they reconcile the teachings of a poor socialist pacifist Middle Eastern refugee with the endless tsunami of moral diarrhea issuing forth from the mouths of evangelical megachurch ministers.
This week her target was Berean Church of Lincoln, Nebraska, home to some of the state’s worst politicians. The church itself employs armed security guards–because whose skull would Jesus blow open?–and has even sent people to the state legislature to ask the government to allow more guns in church.
So Betsies put on their Easter dresses and began festooning the thousands of twatmobiles in the parking lot with this leaflet when a group of the church’s notorious security emerged a wee bit upset at the Betsies, and also likely feeling out of sorts due to the doucheketeer black jacket/jeans/brown shoe fuckknuckle combo that, along with concealed handguns, appear to be standard issue.
These testosterone-addled shartsnufflers proceeded to follow the betsies both on foot and by Ford F-onefitty for over a mile before the betsies lost them. Nothing intimidates a phony cross wagging NRA chode like some ladies with paper. Happy Easter, one and all.
Texas Betsy was strolling through Austin when she encountered this cat in an alley.
