Calling All Betsies!

Are you going to wring your hands on social media when literal fucking Nazis are carrying torches through American cities? Are you going to curl into the fetal position when racist fucks mow a woman down on the street? Not if you’re one of us. Get up, get out there, and hold the line.

NO KKK
NO NRA
NO NEO-NAZI USA

Banner it, flyer it, sticker it, scream it at a fascist GOP legislator. Ruin a Nazi’s day. Be a goddamned American and resist this fucking shit.

Send your photos to us here or at betsyriot@gmail.com

New Mexico’s “Koch Cain Problem”

In May, Americans for Prosperity set up shop in New Mexico, eager to start pumping dark money into state politics after lapdog governor Susana Martinez vetoed a bill that would require fuller disclosure of campaign funding. As you already know, Betsies, Americans for Prosperity is funded by the billionaire Koch Brothers and has been instrumental to funneling massive financial resources into pushing a far-right political agenda across the country that is dead-set on fucking the entire planet.

The New Mexico chapter of Americans for Prosperity is led by Burly Cain, exactly the kind of libertarian chode you would imagine, who, when he is not trying to wedge a flaccid Ayn Rand dystopic future up the unsuspecting poop chute of his state, opposes a living wage and spends his time on such ventures as “Adwallet,” which pays poor people pennies to watch shitty advertisements, thus making them all prosperous again.

Here’s a summary of the platform position of the New Mexico Americans for Prosperity:
–Dark money is just what democracy needs
–Obamacare terrible
–Exiting Paris Climate accord great
–Taxes bad
–Minimum wage bad
–Assault rifles, for-profit Christian “education” and pipelines great

Last night Cain held a NM Americans for Prosperity event, in which he offered to “educate” the public about dark money, trickle-down economics and the brighter future they hold for New Mexico—as bright as a nuclear dawn!

So New Mexico Betsies staged a funeral procession in front of the event, protesting the state’s “Koch Cain problem.” Cain responded by calling armed security—private security, so at least he gets props for libertarian consistency!—to keep a watchful eye on these terrifying Betsies.

Oh, hell the fuck no

Kentucky has exactly one remaining abortion clinic. If you own a uterus and live in Kentucky and your boyfriend slips you a roofie or your uncle rapes you or your 20-week ultrasound shows an anencephalic fetus or you just fucking want to not give birth, your choices if Louisville’s EMW Women’s Surgical Center closes will be:

–Shake out your couch cushions for hundreds of dollars in loose change, then steal away from your oppressive family to drive hundreds of miles in the car you may not have to the nearest clinic in another state.

–Gestate the baby and go through hours of painful and expensive labor anyway, none of which will be covered by medical insurance when the GOP takes it away.

–Take a trip to Hobby Lobby for some knitting needles and hope the housekeeping staff at the Motel 6 doesn’t have to phone-in your bled-out body the next day.

Meanwhile, the “pro-life” Gilead Officers Party (GOP) wants you to have no education about how your body works, no affordable birth control, no maternal leave, and no help with food or childcare after you give birth.

Into this context steps Operation Save America, led by a twatnugget named Rusty Thomas, which is probably also what he nicknamed the blotchy dick he wags in front of the long-suffering woman he uses as breeding stock at home, together with whom he runs–and we shit thee not, dear betsies–“Thomas Nation’s University of Righteousness,” a.k.a. his own private child brainwashing compound in his home in Waco, Texas.

Thomas and OSA want to shut down that clinic because, you know, they care so much for babies and shit.

Seriously, these chodestumps have launched a full-on, weeks-long fetalpalooza in downtown Louisville, caravanning their quiverfuls of sisterwives and progeny to try to shut down the clinic, forcing Homeland Security to create a buffer zone and generally turning the entire area into an open-air Zyogote Temple.

So Kentucky Betsies said, “Oh, hell the fuck no” and put on the red veil to counterprotest these wipes.

NO KKK
NO OSA
NO NEO-NAZI USA

Fuck Your Guns!

Five years ago a deranged fuck slaughtered twelve people and horrifically injured many others at the Century 16 theater in Aurora, Colorado. He was enabled by a parasitic gun industry and vulture lobbyists who made sure that even a fucking obvious psychopath could buy unlimited firepower and ammunition. We are marking the anniversary by distributing this freely downloadable sticker for you to print at home, for placement wherever lead-addled idiots need reminding.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/172pt4ikx55zqg6/AURORA%20DARK%20KNIGHT%20-%20Avery%205163.pdf?dl=0

A Dark Night

July 20 is the anniversary of the Aurora, Colorado, gun massacre in the Cinemark Century 16 movie theater, during a midnight screening of The Dark Knight Rises, when the America-hating, death eating blood suckers of the NRA and the bloody flux-lapping shit wallowers in the U.S. Congress slaughtered by proxy 12 people and injured 70 others after letting a law banning semi-automatic weapons and high capacity magazines lapse in 2004, thereby allowing a mentally disturbed man to purchase them ONLINE.

We’ve uploaded a new sticker commemorating the Aurora massacre to our Betsy Printables Dropbox folder. It is formatted for Avery 5163 labels, available at office supply stores.

Feel free to go see a movie tomorrow. If you see anything interesting, be sure to take a photo of it and send it to us.

Here are the direct links to the .pdf of these stickers:

https://www.dropbox.com/sh/82sax9y30g6uqws/AABtERNLzpmAcCp161bnDcl0a/STICKERS%20-%20GUN%20THEMED/AURORA%20DARK%20KNIGHT%20-%20Avery%205163.pdf?dl=0

https://www.dropbox.com/s/l1yuhfzk59z6vlj/BATMAN%20FUCK%20YOUR%20GUNS%20-%20Avery%205163.pdf?dl=0

Isle of Man Betsies

On the Isle of Man, population 88,000, these five women stood up and stood out against government mandated pregnancy.

If you are ready to be a Betsy drop us a line. You’re fighting for your autonomy, your democracy, your life, and your planet. Leave nice at the door.

betsyriot@gmail.com

Please Control Your Fetus Fetish

Please enjoy our latest free downloadable sticker offering. We are sure many Betsies out there can find a 100% legal and appropriate place to plaster this because slapping them willy-nilly all over the next zygotemobile you see in your neighborhood would be terrible and very very wrong. Click on the link below to download a template to print on Avery 5168/8168 or similar generic labels.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/qe4tt0wlb0twfvx/FETUS%20FETISH%20AVERY%205168%20OR%208168.pdf?dl=0