Spotted en route to Atlanta: the Betsy Billboard! If you are in the city, go check it out. You can find it at the Die-In at Woodruff Park 11:30-2:00. 
A Weekend of Mantears
In Atlanta this weekend, the National Rifle Association will be holding its annual jizz-fest of blood merchants and their frightened, gullible gunlicker consumer base. There, within a convention hall-cum-armory, they will spew anti-American, anti-democracy hate while bizarrely telling themselves they are being patriots, after which they will fritter away their children’s lunch money and/or college fund (depending on their eraser-smudged SAT scores) for death-oriented, but apparently dick-hardening merchandise while outside in the real world, all across America, thousands of lives will be continue to be lost because of an immoral, out-of-control, shittily-regulated, democracy-hating war industry championed by the NRAssholes.
Sounds fun! We think we’ll join in!
Betsy Riot, a nonviolent, but modestly rude and profane organization, will be flying an airplane banner above this craven convention of timorous cretins while also circling them with a mobile billboard promoting the fairly dry fact that they are not “good guys with guns” but “frightened boys with a gun fetish.” We cheekily call it our “ground and air” assault. Because Betsy is nothing if she isn’t cheeky.
To the whiny, gunlicker demographic, this constitutes a violent threat. But what can you expect from people who consider honking a horn in traffic or playing rap music too loud or eating skittle while being black or dancing while being gay or throwing popcorn in a movie theater to be life-threatening? What can you expect from nitwits who are so terrified of life that they need to carry slaughter sticks everywhere they go, including whenever they have a hankering to buy cookies?
We need to remember to bring our umbrellas. The forecast calls for a mantear downpour.
Betsy is Headed to Atlanta
The critic said: “Betsy! You should be ashamed of your behavior! When they go low, we go high!”
To which we said: “Oh. Okay.”
Pennsylvania Betsy Goes to the Grocery
Pennsylvania Betsy improved this magazine at the supermarket.
Fuck Your Guns – New Mexico
In her spare time, New Mexico Betsy likes to dabble in detailing shitty old cars and trucks to bring new life to them and make them more presentable. And she does it for free!–because she’s just that kind of swell gal.
You’re welcome, violence-abiding, children-hating, diseased scrotum-brained gunfuckers! No need to thank New Mexico Betsy! She’s happy to do it!
Seriously.
…She’s reeeeeeal happy to do it.
Fuck Your Guns
Portland, Oregon. Fuck your guns.
P.S. Fundamentals are by definition not advanced, dummies.
Pro-Death Pete, Take 2
Spotted: The Nebraska Republican Party HQ seems to be sporting a criticism of the Republican governor of Nebraska
Depriving Profits to the Death Merchants
Connecticut Betsy was so so sad to see that a careless person threw away all these unbought Cabela’s gift cards at a local CVS, thus depriving the death merchants of profits, that she had to drown her sorrows in some champagne.
No on Nebraska LB68
The mayors of Nebraska towns converged on a historic hotel in downtown Lincoln yesterday, so Betsy greeted them with some flyers.
Only Terrorists Plan Massacres
Get a load of this shit. Some wad of scrotal cheese owns a gun range in Bloomington, Illinois, down the highway from DeKalb, Illinois, where five people were killed and another 17 were injured in a mass shooting at Northern Illinois University on Valentine’s Day in 2008. So what does this shitgibbon behind Darnall’s Gun Works do? He decides to hold a “Valentine’s Day Massacre,” inviting members of the shallow end of the gene pool to come shoot automatic guns in celebration of the toll guns have taken in his state. Betsy saw what this glob of diarrheal mucus was planning and posted some signs near his place of business.
