OH, MERCY. It seems that a Midwestern Betsy was at the local grocery store today when she spied a large garbage can next to an unmanned floral department that was coincidentally also next to a large rack of gift cards to various merchants. What happened next is a blur, but somehow hundreds of gift cards to Cabela’s, Gander Mountain, Bass Pro, and other purveyors of death ended up clean at the bottom of that garbage can! This is a travesty! Now that store cannot earn profits for murder companies. We certainly hope THE FULL FORCE OF THE LAW will go toward solving this dastardly act of gunlickerfucking.