How Not to be a Betsy

Gracious! We’ve spent so much time explaining how to BE a Betsy, we completely overlooked the equally important topic of how NOT to be a Betsy! We hope this meme proves helpful in expanding everyone’s understanding of the Betsy Way.

Betsy Riot Memes,
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How To Be a Betsy – Chapter 5

Part 5 of the instructional video series “How to Be a Betsy”, a Betsy Riot production.

In this episode: we learn how to create a homemade Betsy Banger tool for stapling “bandit signs” high up on telephone poles out of the reach of the angry, pundenda-scented, groping little hands of gunlicker Trumpizoids who might be compelled to rip them down in man-tearful, outraged hissyfits. All of the materials can be purchased at your local home improvement retail store–like, um, 84 Lumber, should one be near you.

NOTE: Bandit signs are more typically used by fast-buck real estate agents to exploit poor people. As such, they are considered a public nuisance by many communities. Be conscious of the laws in your area. Penalties vary. But so does the give-a-shit factor of code enforcers.

Fuck Your Fetus Fetish

If you’re enjoying SB#51 you’ll see an ad for The Handmaid’s Tale, a new series based on Margaret Atwood’s dystopian novel, soon to be aired as a televised series. Having read the book, Betsy knows that life under the Trump/Pence regime is looking awfully fucking familiar – and she is NOT lying down for it.

Behold Betsy, somewhere in Illinois, recently COUNTER-PROTESTING a group of ignorant hypocritical theocratic morality-preaching fetus fetishists hoping to defund Planned Parenthood and restrict women’s reproductive rights. 

Well fuck that.

Betsy, as is her wont, made quite the spectacle of herself, with her Handmaid regalia, nasty signage, and all around disruption of their UnplannedParenthoodParty. As a parting shot Betsy led a rousing chorus of “99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall” sung at full volume and quite probably interfering with the harping hypocritical man of the sackcloth leading the FetusFest™. OOPS!

The picture here is just a preview. Betsy had a more graphic image for those zygote zealots, one that would likely offend the myopic trolls who watch everything we do here on Facebook– hoping to mass report our indelicate language and graphic images that tell the TRUTH, while having a fap in their mom’s basements across the land.

For the full impact of Betsy’s signage, click over to our tweet at

Or go here and read about Gerri Santoro.

The Heartland Resists


Last night in Lincoln, Nebraska, a riot of 15 betsies took to the streets of downtown in response to Senators Ben Sasse’s and Deb Fischer’s pathetic licking of Trump’s boot. Nebraska senators are dutiful fascists fucking over Nebraska children by helping Trump to destroy public education for corporate gain and by remaining silent or issuing simpering lukewarm statements on Trump’s executive actions to oppress immigrants and refugees.

One of the Lincoln Betsies said: “Look how quickly the ‘Never Trump’ Ben Sasse has lined up to genuflect to his master. We gathered to condemn the disgusting moral cowardice and fascist cooperation of both Sasse and Fischer. History does not look kindly on fascist toadies, and the fact that Sasse led a Nebraska university and Fischer’s mother was a teacher makes their approval of DeVos all the more pathetic and outrageous.”

Press Release from Lincoln, NE Betsies

We belatedly checked our message box today and found this press release from yesterday waiting for us. It’s from the Nebraska Betsies!

If you’re in Lincoln and going to their local galley hop downtown–look them up! They’ll be out and about!


February 2, 2017

(Lincoln, Nebraska)— Members of the “neo-suffragette punk patriot” protest group Betsy Riot will hold a street demonstration tomorrow night in downtown Lincoln during the monthly First Friday gallery hop in response to what the group says is the hypocritical “aiding and abetting” of the Trump agenda by Nebraska Senators Ben Sasse and Deb Fischer.

Wearing veiled Victorian widow’s garments as a symbol of mourning, and chanting protest slogans while carrying signs, the group will walk along the sidewalks of the downtown district and voice their opposition to Sasse and Fischer . The group has protested in similar fashion at past public events, including a lecture given by gun rights advocate John Lott, the annual lighting of the Capitol Christmas tree by Gov. Ricketts, and, most recently, the Women’s March in Omaha. At times the group has chanted noisily and epithetically, while at other times simply stood “in silent vigil” with the intent to shame, said a group spokesperson who identified herself only as “Betsy.”

On Friday, she said, the group will be “making some fucking noise.”

“We are outraged at the swift destruction of our beloved country by a psychotic, narcissistic Russian tool and his alcoholic, wife-beating white supremacist advisor,” Betsy said, referring to President Donald J. Trump and chief White House advisor Steve Bannon, respectively.

“Trump is a fucking asshole,” she added. “He wants to screw over Nebraska’s children by destroying their public education for the sake of corporate gain, and the only thing he seems interested in teaching Nebraska’s children, based on his executive actions, is how to hate Muslims and Mexicans, how to finger-fuck women, and how to take a giant shit on the environment.

“The Trump-Bannon agenda is corrupt, idiotic and fascistic,” she aded, “and our two fuckwad senators, Sasse and Fischer, are aiding and abetting that agenda.”

In recent weeks, the Trump Administration has come under fire for an aggressive flurry of executive orders that include a ban on immigrants and refugees from Muslim countries, as well as the appointment of cabinet heads who oppose the departments they are meant to lead, most notably Department of Education nominee Betsy DeVos, a billionaire proponent of vouchers and charter schools whose poor performance before Senate hearings and conflicts of interest have been called “troubling” by her critics.

By supporting DeVos, Senators Sasse and Fisher are failing the people of Nebraska, according to Betsy.

“Trump has nominated an absolute moron to head up our public education,” she added. “The fact that Senator Sasse led a Nebraska university and Senator Fischer’s mother was a teacher makes their approval of DeVos all the more pathetic and outrageous—particularly Ben Sasse, who spent two years beating the ‘Never Trump’ drum and who has now dropped to his knees to genuflect and lick the boot of his fascist master. That is why Betsy Riot is protesting Friday night—to condemn the disgusting, unbelievably fucked-up moral cowardice and debased, ass-eating fascist complicity of Sasse and Fischer. We hope others will join us.”

First Friday begins at 7:00 in the Haymarket and downtown area off Lincoln. Temperatures are expected to be in the 30s.

Betsy Riot is a decentralized neo-suffgagette punk patriot movement dedicated to nonviolent unapologetic resistance to Trump, the NRA, and the white nationalist movement.

Betsy Goes to the Pediatrician

Betsy took her kid to the pediatrician and contributed some stickers to the reward basket.