This may be Betsy’s favorite action yet.
Imagine you are Nebraska’s Governor Pete Ricketts. After a hard legislative session, in which you bought seats in the legislature using your personal wealth and slashed funding to the elderly and disabled children, you go on a feel-good tour through the deep red part of the state, where the very people you fuck over every day will come out to heil you because you make them feel really special for being white even as their disabled kidsget no more services because of you and their elderly parents will have to be moved to a home six hours away.
You’ve learned to keep a low profile in the urban areas because you never know when Betsy will humiliate you over dinner or scare you with mean words on aprons outside your office. But McCook, Nebraska? McCook, population 7,000 and hours and hours from the nearest town big enough for a parking garage? You’ll be safe there, you think to yourself as you pull the wings off a butterfly for fun.
But wait, what’s this you see upon leaving your sausagewank? It’s the BETSY RIOT. In McCook, Nebraska, standing up to say FUCK FASCISM in smalltown Trump Country. She has found you, you piece of sadistic oligarch shit. Big Betsy is watching.