Minnesota State Fair

HAIL MINNESOTA BETSIES!!!

As the dog days of summer wind down, Betsy decided she could not miss the opportunity to visit the supersized Minnesota State Fair, where over 100,000 folks PER DAY will enjoy some family time and funnel cake, along with Betsy’s thoughts on the current state of this here union. We think these Betsies did a bang-up job and made their feelings clear. Like Crystal (<<see what we did there??).

When Betsy departed the fairgrounds she helped Saint Paul and Zumbrota get in on the sweet Betsy action, too.

L’Étoile du Nord, meet L’Étoile de Betsy!

Fuck the Cowards at Everytown

HOLD BETSY’S EARRINGS.

Betsy Riot began with a simple message: FUCK THE NRA and its gunhumping knob-slurping minions. When the NRA and Russia installed President Tiny Hands von Pussy Grabber into office, we expanded our messaging to: FUCK FASCISM, because fascism is the tie that binds.

Which is why we were dismayed recently to learn that Everytown for Gun Safety (ET), the largest so-called “gun violence prevention” organization in America, has chosen a very different message: FASCISM, RACISM, POLICE BRUTALITY, GUNLICKING AND TRUMP ARE FUCKING AWESOME!

Everytown, it turns out, is demonstrating its courage and commitment to ending gun violence in America by co-funding and co-sponsoring the annual circle jerk of police brutality celebrants who comically call themselves the Fraternal Order of Police (FOP)! Everytown is lending their name to the event alongside the NRA, Beretta, and other killing-related tacticalwhateverthefuckwhogivesashit businesses–because the best way to fight gun violence is to give your money to fascists, roll over to show them your vulnerable crotch and hope they like you.

Betsy Riot says: FUCK THAT SHIT.

Our rage at the murder lobbyists now must become a big tent rage that includes Everytown and any other so-called “gun violence prevention group” that has made deliberate, calculated concessions to the NRA and its brown-shirted enablers at the state and federal levels, concessions most often paid for with the lives and bodies of black and brown youth in this country.

Let’s review:

–The FOP endorsed Donald Trump.

–The FOP defended Trump when he gave police a green light to stomp their jackboots all over due process and rough up arrestees.

–The FOP called 12-year-old Tamir Rice, shot dead for holding a toy gun, a “thug.”

–Google “Lautenberg Amendment”. FOP opposed that and sued to stop it.

–A scheduled speaker at this year’s FOPfest is none other than Betty Jo Shelby, the murderous cop who was recently acquitted for the killing of an unarmed black man, Terence Crutcher.

It is unconscionable that a so-called gun violence prevention organization is handing money (whose money? Yours?) alongside the NRA to sponsor an unapologetic fascism fan club. Crushing your moral compass and holding hands with the murderers of unarmed inner city children is no way to end gun violence in this country.

If you care about gun violence, we call on you to stop wasting your dollars by supporting fascism by proxy. Fuck the cowards of Everytown and donate instead to Black Lives Matter or a worthy social justice program of your choice.

And as always, send your mantears and/or momtears to betsyriot@gmail.com

NRA = Murder Lobby

Which industry has monetized America’s original sin, racism? Which industry feeds the flames of hate and fear to coax cowards and racist idiots to arm themselves against their fellow man? The National Rifle Association is the lobbying arm of the American firearms industry, and they make bank off our country burning. Fuck them.
NO KKK
NO NRA
NO NEO-NAZI USA

www.waynelapierre.com

Attention, Betsies.

America’s murder lobby a/k/a the NRA has a new video, in which Death Barbie Dana says that the NRA–we shit thee not– is “coming for” the New York Times. (No links to that shit from here. Google it and turn your volume up to 11 to hear it over the mobs of fapping Duck Dynasty extras that comprise her fan base.) It seems that Wayne LaPierre and crew are not at all happy that the New York Times is hurting the fragile fee-fees of the President they wasted $30million to get elected.

In these polarizing times, we at Betsy Central are angry about fake news, too. So let’s get right to it–for too long the media has sanitized the facts about Wayne LaPierre and his historic success at building the American murder industry. That’s why, when Mr. LaPierre let his domain registration lapse, the Betsy Riot acquired www.waynelapierre.com to right the record. Please check it out and be sure to admire the portfolio of his work.

Ted Nugent – Canceled

**BREAKING**

Check out what just came down the pike.

Do you remember Ted Nugent? He is a has-been “musician” turned NRA board member who has tried to maintain his fame by stoking gunlicking, white nationalist cocksplats into a war against liberals and people of color. He himself avoided actual war by literally shitting his pants to get out of it, then rose to musical s̶t̶a̶r̶d̶o̶m̶ half-chub through such hits as “Jailbait,” about his interest in raping a 13-year-old girl. This peach was recently invited to the White House, where he left a trail of Slim Jim grease and pre-ejaculate all over the golden drapery of the Oval Office.

Well, Ron Onesti, owner of Arcada Theater in St. Charles outside of Chicago, decided to invite this misogynist white supremacist living shart to give a concert there tonight, but was sufficiently aware that Spugent would be received poorly by the city that he didn’t even hang up a single poster to advertise. Imagine Illinois Betsy’s surprise when she strolled by this morning to discover a large handmade CANCELED banner hung on the theater, a rather surprising letter from the Spuge himself on the theater window, an apology taped on the door of nearby businesses, and even a sign decrying the fucker in the front lawn of the theater owner.

“Thanks for the Sepsis”

So what does Louisville, KY, Betsy do to unwind after a long day spent telling hayseed neo-nazis to go fuck their moms? Why, she swings by the home of her old friend and recovering high school swirly victim Sen. Mitch “Murder Turtle” McConnell, and she drops off a “Thanks For The Sepsis” banner on his front doorstep in tribute to his incompetently executed and ultimately failed campaign to destroy healthcare for millions of vulnerable Americans–with a little career advice for the Yertle manqué tossed in for good measure.

A Dark Night

July 20 is the anniversary of the Aurora, Colorado, gun massacre in the Cinemark Century 16 movie theater, during a midnight screening of The Dark Knight Rises, when the America-hating, death eating blood suckers of the NRA and the bloody flux-lapping shit wallowers in the U.S. Congress slaughtered by proxy 12 people and injured 70 others after letting a law banning semi-automatic weapons and high capacity magazines lapse in 2004, thereby allowing a mentally disturbed man to purchase them ONLINE.

We’ve uploaded a new sticker commemorating the Aurora massacre to our Betsy Printables Dropbox folder. It is formatted for Avery 5163 labels, available at office supply stores.

Feel free to go see a movie tomorrow. If you see anything interesting, be sure to take a photo of it and send it to us.

Here are the direct links to the .pdf of these stickers:

https://www.dropbox.com/sh/82sax9y30g6uqws/AABtERNLzpmAcCp161bnDcl0a/STICKERS%20-%20GUN%20THEMED/AURORA%20DARK%20KNIGHT%20-%20Avery%205163.pdf?dl=0

https://www.dropbox.com/s/l1yuhfzk59z6vlj/BATMAN%20FUCK%20YOUR%20GUNS%20-%20Avery%205163.pdf?dl=0