Ted Nugent – Canceled

**BREAKING**

Check out what just came down the pike.

Do you remember Ted Nugent? He is a has-been “musician” turned NRA board member who has tried to maintain his fame by stoking gunlicking, white nationalist cocksplats into a war against liberals and people of color. He himself avoided actual war by literally shitting his pants to get out of it, then rose to musical s̶t̶a̶r̶d̶o̶m̶ half-chub through such hits as “Jailbait,” about his interest in raping a 13-year-old girl. This peach was recently invited to the White House, where he left a trail of Slim Jim grease and pre-ejaculate all over the golden drapery of the Oval Office.

Well, Ron Onesti, owner of Arcada Theater in St. Charles outside of Chicago, decided to invite this misogynist white supremacist living shart to give a concert there tonight, but was sufficiently aware that Spugent would be received poorly by the city that he didn’t even hang up a single poster to advertise. Imagine Illinois Betsy’s surprise when she strolled by this morning to discover a large handmade CANCELED banner hung on the theater, a rather surprising letter from the Spuge himself on the theater window, an apology taped on the door of nearby businesses, and even a sign decrying the fucker in the front lawn of the theater owner.

“Thanks for the Sepsis”

So what does Louisville, KY, Betsy do to unwind after a long day spent telling hayseed neo-nazis to go fuck their moms? Why, she swings by the home of her old friend and recovering high school swirly victim Sen. Mitch “Murder Turtle” McConnell, and she drops off a “Thanks For The Sepsis” banner on his front doorstep in tribute to his incompetently executed and ultimately failed campaign to destroy healthcare for millions of vulnerable Americans–with a little career advice for the Yertle manqué tossed in for good measure.

Fuck Your Guns!

Five years ago a deranged fuck slaughtered twelve people and horrifically injured many others at the Century 16 theater in Aurora, Colorado. He was enabled by a parasitic gun industry and vulture lobbyists who made sure that even a fucking obvious psychopath could buy unlimited firepower and ammunition. We are marking the anniversary by distributing this freely downloadable sticker for you to print at home, for placement wherever lead-addled idiots need reminding.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/172pt4ikx55zqg6/AURORA%20DARK%20KNIGHT%20-%20Avery%205163.pdf?dl=0

The Great San Diego Betsy Riot Dick Drop

 

The San Diego betsies discovered that in the wonderful world of the Internet, a neo-suffragette punk patriot who likes to fuck shit up could easily purchase–at a surprisingly reasonable cost!–a giant inflatable dick.

Ever in search of new and exciting messaging formats with which to fight fascism and tell the death-eating blood merchants of  the NRA to go fuck themselves, the San Diego betsies purchased one.  Then they decorated it with a special message to their best girlfriend forever—-the hack NRA podcaster, remaindered bin authoress and gunhumper jerk-off model Dana “Kill Them ALL!” Loesch, a psychopathic woman-hating cool girl gun-quim who recently made a promotional NRA video encouraging gibbering, gun-licking, monkey putz-pullers to put down her Guns & Ammo centerfold, pull up their not-so-ambiguously stained whitie-tighties and cammo pants, pick up their guns, remember just how terrifying and dick-wilting women who tell you to fuck off are, then go shoot a few Women’s Marchers, who today made a pilgrimage through the sweltering heat from the NRA headquarters to the Justice Department in Washington, D.C.

Because: AHHHHHHH!!!  WOMEN WHO TELL ME TO GO FUCK MYSELF!!!  GYAHHHHHHH!!!!

And so it was that the San Diego betsies took their inflatable dick with their message to Dana Loesch and  did a late-night dick drop at their local gun range.

Because fuck you, gunfucking psychopaths who hate women.  And that includes you, Dana.

 

 

 

 

Campus Carry in Kansas

Today is the day that the law allowing unregulated concealed carry at Kansas colleges and universities goes into effect. Students and anyone else may now legally carry loaded handguns into classrooms with no training or licensing–not that training or licensing would even make that flaming horseshit okay.

Campus carry is fundamentally about two things. 1) It expands the gun market by removing that pesky four-year no-guns period between having rifles at your parents’ house and having rifles at your own house, which keeps little gunlicker chodes loyal lifelong customers even while away from home. 2) It allows feculent red state shitbag legislators to make over oases of liberality and learning into the benighted feudal cesspools where they feel comfortable.

So today Kansas betsies protested the NRA fucking over their campuses with some beautiful signage and a helpful note on the doorstep of the chancellor of the KU system, reminding her that she rolled over for this bullshit.

Piss on Yer Guns – The Second Installment

Attention, Betsy USA! A particularly diabolical betsy in Texas has devised a DELICIOUS plan for pranking the gun lobby and harvesting gallons of refreshing gunlicker man tears. Totally nonviolent (of course) and 100% legal (unlike the things Wayne LaPierre does with his mom). She has designed and is selling this beautiful “piss on yer guns” line of products to fund the plan. Please throw some cash in her direction and sit tight–if she gets the money she needs (where is George Soros when you need him?) we will be spreading the fruits of her labor far and wide. Any funds raised in excess will go toward other Betsy actions.

We love this pride version, especially as the anniversary of Orlando Pulse approaches and our shitwit Congress enjoyed another year of NRA kickback, but a regular black and white version is also available (posted in comments below).

https://teespring.com/new-piss-on-yer-guns-2…

Join the Feminist Punk Patriot Resistance!

Is Betsy in YOUR state? Of course she is. She’s YOU.

You’ve called. You’ve emailed. You’ve marched. Now it’s time to fuck this fascist shit up. Grab a few of your friends and drop us a line. We are the anonymous nonviolent grassroots feminist resistance. We’ll help you set up a riot in your hometown.