This one weird trick makes your douchemobile acceptable.
Kentucky governor Matt Bevin–an aspiring forced pregnancy farmer who dreams of industrialized birthing warehouses packed with impregnated 12 year old girls who’ve been raped (an enterprise that he plans to underwrite with profits from his used coat hanger business) has gone on the official record as wanting to rid the state of any and all women’s healthcare clinics that might interfere with his woman-enslaving dream by providing the women of Kentucky with their constitutionally protected right to abortion.
Now there’s just one women’s clinic remaining in the state that provides abortions, and drooling, depraved sick fuck Matt Bevin smells victory in the air!–or maybe its just the skanky scent of blister ooze generated from excessive chode-jerking at the idea of enslaving women and owning their pussies. Who knows? Maybe he should hold his cracked, bleeding, overly-yanked pee-pee up to state inspector general Robert Silverthorn’s face and ask him what he thinks it smells like. You know–other than Bevin’s mother’s undies.
Not so fast there, you pulpy, unwashed fart muscles! EMW Women’s Clinic, Kentucky’s last abortion provider, along with Planned Parenthood and the ACLU, would like a word with you. In court. In federal fucking court. Because they’re suing your misogynistic, chode yanking-and-sniffing selves.
It seems that the state has been constantly and maliciously changing its regulatory rules for EMW in the hope of tripping it up, finding it in violation, and closing it down. Chodemeister Bevin and his prison bitch Silverthorn claim it’s all because they love women so much, they want to ensure their health is rigorously protected with nothing but the finest inefficient bullshit that bureaucracy can offer.
EMW, PP, and ACLU beg to differ.
And the Kentucky Betsies were there in Handmaid’s garb standing in silent vigil, bearing witness.
The KY Bets were last seen in their Handmaid garb this summer, at the woman-hating, fetusfetishalooza put on by the Christianity-debasing, pussy-obsessed, forced-birth fanatics Operation Save America.
Way to go, Kentucky Betsies!
Kentucky has exactly one remaining abortion clinic. If you own a uterus and live in Kentucky and your boyfriend slips you a roofie or your uncle rapes you or your 20-week ultrasound shows an anencephalic fetus or you just fucking want to not give birth, your choices if Louisville’s EMW Women’s Surgical Center closes will be:
–Shake out your couch cushions for hundreds of dollars in loose change, then steal away from your oppressive family to drive hundreds of miles in the car you may not have to the nearest clinic in another state.
–Gestate the baby and go through hours of painful and expensive labor anyway, none of which will be covered by medical insurance when the GOP takes it away.
–Take a trip to Hobby Lobby for some knitting needles and hope the housekeeping staff at the Motel 6 doesn’t have to phone-in your bled-out body the next day.
Meanwhile, the “pro-life” Gilead Officers Party (GOP) wants you to have no education about how your body works, no affordable birth control, no maternal leave, and no help with food or childcare after you give birth.
Into this context steps Operation Save America, led by a twatnugget named Rusty Thomas, which is probably also what he nicknamed the blotchy dick he wags in front of the long-suffering woman he uses as breeding stock at home, together with whom he runs–and we shit thee not, dear betsies–“Thomas Nation’s University of Righteousness,” a.k.a. his own private child brainwashing compound in his home in Waco, Texas.
Thomas and OSA want to shut down that clinic because, you know, they care so much for babies and shit.
Seriously, these chodestumps have launched a full-on, weeks-long fetalpalooza in downtown Louisville, caravanning their quiverfuls of sisterwives and progeny to try to shut down the clinic, forcing Homeland Security to create a buffer zone and generally turning the entire area into an open-air Zyogote Temple.
So Kentucky Betsies said, “Oh, hell the fuck no” and put on the red veil to counterprotest these wipes.
Please enjoy our latest free downloadable sticker offering. We are sure many Betsies out there can find a 100% legal and appropriate place to plaster this because slapping them willy-nilly all over the next zygotemobile you see in your neighborhood would be terrible and very very wrong. Click on the link below to download a template to print on Avery 5168/8168 or similar generic labels.
This video just in from one of the groups of Betsies who crashed the Zygotians in front of Planned Parenthoods across the country yesterday. The betsies were dressed as handmaids from Margaret Atwood‘s “The Handmaid’s Tale.” It’s hard to make out on the recording, but the betsies believe the prayer being chanted by the Zygotians went something like this:
Hail Zygote, full of life,
life is in thee and nowhere else,
shield thee from all trespassers,
then let thee perish in misery and poverty or a rain of bullets upon thy birth.
For we give not a shit about thy mother,
her safety or sanity,
nor thyself upon entry into the world,
especially if thou art born in poverty or brown skin,
for then thou shalt pull thyself up by thy bootstraps,
except we cut thy bootstraps and called thee a freeloader
and built a wall to keep thee away from us
and stored up our AR-15s to shoot thee down.
OOOPS we did it again, motherfuckers!
#SorryNotSorry about crashing your FetusFestival™ again, holy rollers!
The call went out from the IVORY AF TOWER to turn up and #ProtestPP today, and like dutiful sheeple they arrived to wave pre-printed signs and hurl bible verses like RPGs aimed at reproductive choice.