A Weekend of Mantears

In Atlanta this weekend, the National Rifle Association will be holding its annual jizz-fest of blood merchants and their frightened, gullible gunlicker consumer base. There, within a convention hall-cum-armory, they will spew anti-American, anti-democracy hate while bizarrely telling themselves they are being patriots, after which they will fritter away their children’s lunch money and/or college fund (depending on their eraser-smudged SAT scores) for death-oriented, but apparently dick-hardening merchandise while outside in the real world, all across America, thousands of lives will be continue to be lost because of an immoral, out-of-control, shittily-regulated, democracy-hating war industry championed by the NRAssholes.

Sounds fun! We think we’ll join in!

Betsy Riot, a nonviolent, but modestly rude and profane organization, will be flying an airplane banner above this craven convention of timorous cretins while also circling them with a mobile billboard promoting the fairly dry fact that they are not “good guys with guns” but “frightened boys with a gun fetish.” We cheekily call it our “ground and air” assault. Because Betsy is nothing if she isn’t cheeky.

To the whiny, gunlicker demographic, this constitutes a violent threat. But what can you expect from people who consider honking a horn in traffic or playing rap music too loud or eating skittle while being black or dancing while being gay or throwing popcorn in a movie theater to be life-threatening? What can you expect from nitwits who are so terrified of life that they need to carry slaughter sticks everywhere they go, including whenever they have a hankering to buy cookies?

We need to remember to bring our umbrellas. The forecast calls for a mantear downpour.

#NRAAM2017 #BetsyRiot #NRA #FuckTheNRA

Good Friday Bible Quiz

A Nebraska Betsy celebrated Good Friday by reminding the parishioners of a rightwing church that their death-penalty-pushing governor, Pete Ricketts, is an insult to the teachings of their savior. While the congregation reflected on the suffering and death of Jesus, their governor had illegally imported execution drugs and personally bankrolled a ballot initiative to get the death penalty back in the state.

Betsy Goes to the Zoo

Nebraska’s deatheater governor Pete Ricketts, who has never met a pipeline or lethal injection he didn’t like nor a public resource he does not want to fuck back into the middle ages, was bafflingly invited to speak at a ceremony for a children’s zoo today. So some Nebraska Betsies decorated a couple hundred chairs at the venue for the occasion.

Betsy’s Bible Quiz

Parishioners at fascist-enabling churches in U.S. Rep. Steve KKKing’s congressional district in Iowa were reminded via a bible quiz on windshields, doors, and signs that their theology might make them feel like God’s chosen people but it is actually a steaming load of white supremacist horseshit.

Steve King = National Disgrace

Last week, rancid crotch cheese and self-proclaimed “champion for Western civilization,” Iowa Congressman Steve King, made news when, in the context of praising Dutch white supremacist candidate Geert Wilders, he tweeted: “We can’t restore our civilization with someone else’s babies.”

Though KKKing’s tweet shocked many across the nation, it shocked not at all the Iowa Betsies, who have been enduring this kind of racist filth since King was first elected. By their estimation, this had to have been the 1 million-gazillionth-fucktillionth racist discharge to be issued by the badly infected, suppurating buttock chancre that is King’s mouth.

Which, once they thought about it, was a milestone that the Iowa Betsies felt should be recognized. So off they went to Steve King’s hometown of Kiron, cutting a riotous swath of Fuckyouness across the Hawkeye State.

They tacked on a “truth in advertising” addendum to Kiron’s town sign. They declared King’s home a “National Disgrace Site” with a helpful directional sign pointing the way for tourists. And they planted an historic marker on Rep. King’s actual front lawn. …Just in time to swing by his church in Odebolt where they left a helpful reminder to his church’s Nazi-enabling parishioners that fascism, white supremacy, and gun idolatry make the Middle Eastern refugee they claim to worship very very sad.

And then it was home for milk and cookies. And the satisfaction of shit well fucked-up.

Here’s to you, Iowa Betsies! You make the heartland proud!

A Tall Glass of Hot Creamy Man Tears

Betsies in Nebraska are sitting back and enjoying a tall glass of hot creamy man tears after an entire congregation of ethically impaired trumpsterbuckets shit their pants because some Betsy violated their safe space by putting super mean and true **paper flyers** on their windshields. Poor snowflakes!

Here’s the statement a Nebraska Betsy gave the reporter when the reporter asked why Betsy Riot chose rightwing churches as the target of their flyers:

“These legislators control policy at the federal and state levels. Their policies lead to the death and suffering of immigrant kids and refugees. They are inhumane, craven deatheaters who build profit and political careers off of inflicting misery on the most vulnerable people among us, the people who most need our compassion and help. How do they get away with this? They go to churches every Sunday that gift them with the veneer of piety and respectability, that let them preen themselves as God-fearing servants of Christ. In fact, they are violating the most basic moral tenets and their churches are providing them cover. 

Betsy Riot is about the difference between being polite and doing good. We don’t give a rat’s ass if those churchgoers think we are rude while they sit in their Sunday best lending religious credibility to men who crush children fleeing from war.”

And P.S., Congressman Don Bacon: walking on water is the least significant difference between you and the savior you profess to follow. Start with the fundamental flaw in your moral compass, you piece of shit.

#HeFeltLikeHeWasOffended

http://fox42kptm.com/…/unusual-flyers-placed-on-cars-target…

Pro-Death Pete

Betsies in Omaha, Nebraska, printed flyers condemning the immoral nutsackery of their elected officials, including Governor Pete Ricketts, who so loves executing people that he overrode his state legislature on the matter and illegally imported execution drugs, all while flaunting his “pro life” Catholicism, and Congressman Don Bacon, who, like most bootlicking Trumpster fires, claims to be “pro life” and thumps a Bible while pushing guns everywhere and consigning poor children to death. Fuck those hypocritical deathslurping twatloogies. The Betsies visited these esteemed statesmen’s complicit congregations on Sunday, tucking a flyer onto every windshield in sight.

GOP = KKKGB

Our new flyer on lying sack of shit white supremacist Jefferson Beauregard Sessions can be printed, dropped, stapled, or taped wherever whitewing treasonous fuckery needs calling out, which is everywhere.
Downloadable PDF here: https://www.dropbox.com/s/1jpxccdogi2tj7p/KKKGB.pdf?dl=0